读后续写是一种将阅读与写作紧密结合的考查形式,旨在考查考生的综合语言运用能力。考生要抓住故事的叙事线索,依据原文的写作思路续写文章,并适当发散。
对于这类题型,我们需要注意的问题是:
1、写什么
2、怎么写
今天我们将以2021年的新高考I卷题目为例,对英语读后续写方法探究!
The twins were filled with excitement as they thought of the surprise they were planning for Mother’s Day. How pleased and proud Mother would be when they brought her breakfast in bed. They planned to make French toast and chicken porridge. They had watched their mother in the kitchen. There was nothing to it. Jenna and Jeff knew exactly what to do.
The big day came at last. The alarm rang at 6 a.m. The pair went down the stairs quietly to the kitchen. They decided to boil the porridge first. They put some rice into a pot of water and left it to boil while they made the French toast. Jeff broke two eggs into a plate and added in some milk. Jenna found the bread and put two slices into the egg mixture. Next, Jeff turned on the second stove burner to heat up the frying pan. Everything was going smoothly until Jeff started frying the bread. The pan was too hot and the bread turned black within seconds. Jenna threw the burnt piece into the sink and put in the other slice of bread. This time, she turned down the fire so it cooked nicely.
Then Jeff noticed steam shooting out of the pot and the lid starting to shake. The next minute, the porridge boiled over and put out the fire. Jenna panicked. Thankfully, Jeff stayed calm and turned off the gas quickly. But the stove was a mess now. Jenna told Jeff to clean it up so they could continue to cook the rest of the porridge. But Jeff’s hand touched the hot burner and he gave a cry of pain. Jenna made him put his hand in cold water. Then she caught the smell of burning. Oh dear! The piece of bread in the pan had turned black as well.
注意:
1. 续写词数应为150左右;
2. 请按如下格式在答题卡的相应位置作答。
As the twins looked around them in disappointment, their father appeared.
The twins carried the breakfast upstairs and woke their mother up.
【原文分析】
本文以第三人称,描述了一对双胞胎在母亲节为妈妈做早餐,送上一份惊喜的故事。这也是新高考的第一次续写真题。整体难度不大,所描述事件贴近生活,是每个孩子都可能经历过的事情,故事情节的发展也一目了然。如何在平淡的情节上增加故事色彩,则是本篇文章写作的更高境界。
明线:A surprise
暗线:love between families
根据续写部分第一段的首句,可以知道正在双胞胎失望之时,父亲的出现给他们带来了希望。可以从以下的几个方面入手去考虑问题:
呈上: How did father feel on seeing the mess?
细节: What did father do to help?
启下: Who cooked the breakfast at last?
在第一段的描写当中,同学们可以充分的利用原文中的信息,描写做饭的场景。以达到对原文呼应的目的。父亲帮忙后,怎样还让母亲感觉到惊喜呢?这是父亲和孩子们之间的一个小秘密。
第二段则是向妈妈献上惊喜的时刻了。
呈上:What did they say?
细节:How did mother react and feel?
点题: What a surprise!
第二段可以运用到平时练习用过的表示惊喜、感动的情感描写。
温馨提示:据说,答题卡是长成这样子的,
行高8毫米,行宽≈19厘米(实际宽度18.7-18.8厘米)
读后续写:共18行(段落开头占2行,可写作的空间8.5行*2段)
所以,大家在写作的时候,特别是文采洋溢的同学们,一定要控制好字数。不要超出答题范围呀!
2021 高考英语全国Ⅰ卷试题—读后续写原文及出处
Mother’s Day Celebration with Twin Child – an Open Speech
The twins rubbed their hands with glee as they thought of the surprise they were planning for
Mother’s Day. How pleased and proud Mother would be when they brought her breakfast in bed.
They planned to make French toast and chicken porridge. They had watched their mother in the
kitchen. There was nothing to it. Jenna and Jeff knew exactly what to do.
The big day dawned at last. The alarm rang at 6 a.m. The pair crept down the stairs to the kitchen.
They decided to boil the porridge first. They put some rice into a pot of water and left it to boil
while they made the French toast. Jeff broke two eggs into a plate and added in some milk. Jenna
found the bread and put two slices into the egg mixture. Next, Jeff turned on the second stove
burner to heat up the frying pan. Everything was going smoothly until Jeff started frying the bread.
The pan was too hot and the bread turned black within minutes. Jenna threw the burnt piece into
the sink and put in the other slice of bread. This time, she turned down the fire so it cooked nicely.
Then Jeff noticed the pot cover starting to move. The next minute, the porridge boiled over and put
out the fire. Jenna panicked. Thankfully, Jeff stayed calm and turned off the gas. But the stove was
a mess now. Jenna told Jeff to wipe up the sticky stuff so they could continue to cook the rest of the
porridge. But Jeff’s hand touched the hot burner and he gave a yelp of pain. Jenna made him put
his hand under the tap. Then she caught the smell of burning. Oh dear! The piece of bread in the
pan had turned black as well.
(续写分水岭:以上为给定部分,以下为续写部分原文)
As the twins looked around them in dismay, their father appeared in the doorway. One look and he
knew what they were up to. Seeing their crestfallen faces, he told them to clean up the kitchen
while he helped them make breakfast for Mother. The twins cheered up and did as told. Within an
hour, the kitchen was cleaned, and Father had made some egg sandwiches and cooked some oat
porridge. Then he sneaked back to bed. The twins prepared the breakfast tray, adding a card they
had made, and then carried the tray upstairs to their parents’ bedroom.
The twins woke their mother up by hugging her and yelling ‘Happy Mother’s Day, darling
Mummy!’ Mother hugged the twins. Her eyes widened at the sight of the breakfast tray. She shook
Father who was pretending to snore. He feigned astonishment when he saw the breakfast. Mother
bit into a sandwich and said it was the best she had ever tasted. Jeff immediately wanted to have a
bite. Jenna caught her father’s eye and they winked at each other secretly.
文章出处:
https://www.assignmentpoint.com/other/mothers-day-celebration-with-twin-child-an-open-speech.
读后续写分析及备考策略
—以2021年新高考I 卷为例
I. 题型解读
我们知道读后续写是高考英语中出现的新题型,在这一题型中出题者提供一篇350词以内的文本,要求学生根据文本内容,在给定段首句的基础上进行150词左右的续写。读后续写将阅读与写作紧密结合,考查学生把握短文关键信息和语言特点的能力,语言运用的准确性和丰富性,对语篇结构的把控能力和创造性思维能力。(刘庆思,2016)。
为什么读后续写会成为高考英语新题型?了解一下它的发展史,我们不难找到答案。2012年,我国第二语言习得专家王初明教授提出了“读后续写是提高外语学习效率的一种有效方法”,认为读后续写活动能让学生在模仿与创造结合的情境下培养语言能力和批判性思维,有利于促进协同发展(王初明,2012)。随后,不少学者对读后续写理论进行发展,并结合高考英语应用文写作存在的复制模板、表达局限等问题,主张将读后续写设为高考英语中写作新题型(王初明,亓鲁霞,2013),试图由此提升学生的逻辑思维能力以及语言协同能力、语言组织能力等。2015年,王初明教授对于读后续写的促学优势进行了阐述,认为读后续写活动能够释放学生的想象力,培养创新思维能力;读后续写活动能够将理解与产出紧密结合;能够创造性地模仿和使用语言等(王初明,2015)。相比于传统的应用文写作,读后续写确实有着不可比拟的好处。经过大量学者、专家对读后续写作为高考英语写作新题型的可行性研究,2016年10月,浙江省首次作为试点省份将读后续写作为高考英语卷写作新题型,2020年6月,我们山东成为试点省份在高考英语卷采用该题型。现在的趋势呈现为读后续写题型将会成为更多省份的高考新题型。
从读后续写简短的发展史,我们可以看出它之所以能成为高考新题型,是因为专家学者们从理论和实证研究两方面证实了它有很好的促教促学作用,也就是说这种测试题型能对教学产生积极的反拨效应(positive washback effect)。而当今语言测试设计把反拨效应视为首要考量因素(参阅Bachman & Palmer 2010),格外在意测试是否促教促学。因此读后续写成为高考英语新题型也就不足为奇了。
III. 学情分析
我随机选取了三名同学的习作,看看有什么亮点和问题。
习作一:
本文书写漂亮整洁,思路没有问题,必须给赞。但是语言的准确性方面需要改进,比如, “break into laughter” 写成了 “break into laugh”, “intention”写成了“intension”,“with their joint efforts” 写成了”by their joint effort”, “seeing mom eat their breakfast and praise them”写成了 “seeing mom ate their breakfast and praised them”,“looked at each other”写成了“looked each other”. 两段共150词左右的续写中包括了单词词性错误,单词拼写错误,介词短语中介词使用错误,语法错误等,这是不少同学的共同问题,必须引起足够重视。语言运用的准确性和丰富性是读后续写的考察重点之一,其中准确性是最基本的,没有准确性,丰富性也得不到保证。
综上所述,2021年新高考I 卷的读后续写文本易读易理解,思路明确,同学们在文本阅读理解和思路方面没有问题,主要问题在于语言使用的准确性和丰富性上。
IV. 备考策略
鉴于上面提到的问题,我们在备考策略中主要有以下几点做法。
第一,加强对教材及试题中重点词和词块的听写,以提高语言准确性。这里的准确性不单单指拼写和词性使用方面,还指语用中的准确性。所以在听写的时候,我们会给学生提供整句为语境,这样同学们不仅仅注意单词或词块正确的拼写,还会注意它们在语境中的遣词造句。以人教版选择性必修第四册第三单元词块a sight to behold为例,听写的时候同学们听到的不是 “壮观的景象”, 而是“Rocky coastlines and long golden beaches were 壮观的景象”这样一句话。在单词记忆这条路上,从某种意义上讲,一次语境的强化,胜过十次机械的重复。
第二,积累动作、表情、心理、环境描写,以及各种修辞方法,丰富自己的记叙文类英文语料库。以动作描写为例,其中尤其要注意微动作和具体动作。微动作可以体现人物的情绪,比如,“After hearing his son’s words, he frowned.” 微动作frown就体现了父亲的情绪和态度。具体动作可以增强画面感,比如 “The kid licked the ice cream happily.”用具体动作lick代替概括词eat,立即让句子有了画面感。修辞手法的使用也会让描写更形象生动。比如明喻 “The icy wind started howling, cutting my face like a sharp knife.”所以使用明喻,暗喻,拟人,夸张等修辞手法的表达也是我们重点积累的材料。
第三,阅读原著,读精读透。《夏洛的网》是我们选择阅读的第一本书,方法不难,坚持是关键。具体操作如下:学生先自行阅读一章,阅读过程中,认识的重点词汇标出,重要但不认识的词汇猜测词义;然后老师和同学们一起阅读该章,老师也标出重点词汇和同学们的进行核对。最后,以听写,填空,问答等形式检查同学们对作品中词汇的掌握。读透读精,真正掌握了词汇的意义和使用情景,学生们就可以灵活使用了。比如,表示Fern被小猪吸引的句子,“Fern couldn’t take her eyes off the tiny pig.”本句就可以通过改编来表示被其他任何东西吸引,比如 “He couldn’t take his eyes off the beautiful stones/the books.”
第四,学以致用,语言准确性和丰富性最终落实在写作上。我们坚持每周一篇读后续写,具体操作如下:周一写读后续写;周二学生之间互批;周三课上老师和同学们一起分析续写思路,课下学生根据范文和自己的习作进行二次创作;周四老师批改,重点关注语言;周五周六周日彻底背诵自己的作品,老师检查督促。
V. 结语
读后续写的提升不是一朝一夕的事情,但是朝夕的点滴积累,肯定会发生质的飞跃。正如我们常说的A little effort every day, you will make a big difference.
(2021•新高考Ⅰ)阅读下面材料,根据其内容和所给段落开头语续写两段,使之构成一篇完整的短文。
A MOTHER’S DAY SURPRISE
The twins were filled with excitement as they thought of the surprise they were planning for Mother’s Day.How pleased and proud Mother would be when they brought her breakfast in bed.They planned to make French toast and chicken porridge.They had watched their mother in the kitchen.There was nothing to it.Jenna and Jeff knew exactly what to do.
The big day came at last.The alarm rang at 6 a.m.The pair went down the stairs quietly to the kitchen.They decided to boil the porridge first.They put some rice into a pot of water and left it to boil while they made the French toast.Jeff broke two eggs into a plate and added in some milk.Jenna found the bread and put two slices into the egg mixture.Next,Jeff turned on the second stove burner to heat up the frying pan.Everything was going smoothly until Jeff started frying the bread.The pan was too hot and the bread turned black within seconds.Jenna threw the burnt piece into the sink and put in the other slice of bread.This time,she turned down the fire so it cooked nicely.
Then Jeff noticed steam shooting out of the pot and the lid starting to shake.The next minute,the porridge boiled over and put out the fire.Jenna panicked.Thankfully,Jeff stayed calm and turned off the gas quickly.But the stove was a mess now.Jenna told Jeff to clean it up so they could continue to cook the rest of the porridge.But Jeff’s hand touched the hot burner and he gave a cry of pain.Jenna made him put his hand in cold water.Then she caught the smell of burning.Oh dear!The piece of bread in the pan had turned black as well.
注意:
1.续写词数应为150左右;
2.请按如下格式在答题卡的相应位置作答。
As the twins looked around them in disappointment,their father appeared.___________
The twins carried the breakfast upstairs and woke their mother up.__________
2021的真题这里Alfred暂时不做分析。大家想要练习可以写完发给我,看完我就私信回复一下,真题暂时不做评分和总结。
这里先不附范文,大家如果想找可以上网查询。
读后续写常规操作:
1) 识别故事山
把小说情节的四部分活用到这里来:就是开端,发展,高潮,结局。
锁定原文和续写内容所对应的部分,有助于我们找到写作思路,也可以辅助我们构思。更重要的是它可以帮助我们定好位,提醒我们第一段和第二段的衔接处如何过渡,每一段结束后如何巧妙按规定字数刹车。
2) 圈画原文细节
这一步就是要找问题,找细节。我们第一次续写的试题就是一个很好的例子。
圈画细节,扣住原文是一篇续写是否贴合原文的判定标准。这不是高级要求,而是一篇文章能否获得及格分(即15分,满分25分)的标准。在这里先不分解,这一点我会在第一次作业总结和以后的总结中会细细展开。
3) 谋篇布局
想好每一段要写什么,这一步骤的重中之重就是要逐字解读任务两段尤其是第二段的段首句。
上文提到贴合原文是一个基本要求,那么这里再加一条就是流畅。这是拿到及格分以后再往上涨分的增分点,也是语言基础薄弱和衔接意识不强的同学的重大劣势。一篇文章不流畅会导致阅卷老师的阅读停顿,这种文章的下场大概率是降分降档。
清晰的目标一定是解决问题,对照第二步的圈画进行谋篇会事半功倍,所以第二步一定要做细做好。
4) 下笔成文
这里提高更多是靠实践。实践的时候一定要牢记的一点一定是:书写工整,卷面整洁,尽量集中精力不要写错。
5) 回看检查
找到错的地方怎么改?相信各位的语文老师也讲过,小小错误可以放着,打错划一条线在上面用原字体修改的修改法则。
检查是对自己写过的文章心里有个数。不能做太长的停留。
个人意见:
Alfred(之后我就如此称呼自己)认为,一个同学真正地掌握读后续写这一类题型,在考试中也不是次次都能锁定高分。因为续写不仅仅是考同学们的英语功底,每个同学都有擅长和不擅长写的故事。如何在高考中保稳20+,或冲上20是我们每次练习的目标。
读后续写的高手各有千秋:有的语言老练,辞藻优美;有的情节贴合,主旨深刻;有的书写美观,结构高级。
这些长处一篇文章内基本做不到全部包含。虽然每一个都是加分项,但是仔细阅读接近满分的作文不难发现,写作的过程中并没有刻意去囊括这些加分项,而是让原汁原味的英语故事从笔尖流淌出来。
这就是Alfred所认为的好作文。仔细阅读原文,囊括所有需要写到的要点,回答隐藏在文章中的所有问题,写出自然的英语故事。当然切记不要天马行空,胡乱发挥情节,求稳求自然。是Alfred所总结出的写出好作文的不二法门。当然夯实英语基本功,积累高级词汇和句型,也是读后续写获得高分的必备条件。
参考文献:
[1] Bachman, L. & A.Palmer. 2010. Language Assessment in the Real World: Developing Language Tests and Justifying Their Use [M]. Oxford:OUP.
[2] 王初明.读后续写—提高外语学习效率的一种有效方法[J].外语界,2012(5) : 2-7.
[3] 王初明,亓鲁霞.读后续写题型研究[J].外语教学与研究,2013(5) : 707-718.
[4] 王初明.读后续写何以有效促学[J].外语教学与研究,2015(5) : 753-762.
[5] 刘庆思,陈康. 关于一年两考高考英语试卷中读后续写设计的研究[J].中小学外语教学, 2016(1) : 1-6.
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